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nadya

USA
Topic initiated on Tuesday, December 21, 2004  -  9:59 PM Reply with quote
Why are we impatient with opposing views?


Asalamu Alaykum
(peace be upon you)

Why do you think people are impatient with views different from their own?
What can we do to change this attitude in and around us?
Please write in your thoughts.
Junaidj

CANADA
Posted - Wednesday, December 22, 2004  -  6:43 AM Reply with quote
>>Why do you think people are impatient with views different from their own?

In my opinion it differs from person to person. The following are mere musings.

1) For very religious persons, it is more to do with the conviction that what I believe is correct and all else is nonsense and not even worth considering.

In this category even those with PhDs will falter. They refuse to consider the possibility that the other opinion could be correct.

2) Generally, most people are comfortable with a list of dos or donts without having to think about them. They want a 'regiment' set of tasks and dislike change.

3) For some difference of opinion means loss of control. Some clerics are guilty of this, and in their stubborness they indulge in pride and self righteousness - a sin more ghastly than any other else.

>>What can we do to change this attitude in and around us?

1)Internalize and not just read the following:

“I am convinced about the veracity of my opinions, but I do consider it likely that they may turn out to be incorrect. Likewise, I am convinced about the incorrectness of the views different from mine, but I do concede the possibility that they may turn out to be correct.” -- Imam Shafa’i

2) Have patience and tolerance for other people, no matter how wretched according to one's principles and beliefs.

3) Follow Jesus's words 'Love one another' (without expectation of any return)

4) To understand that a lot falls in the grey as opposed to being black and white.

5) Patience and Humility. Accept teachings from other places. Look for similarities as opposed to differences. There is a lot one could learn from Hinduism, Buddhism, the philosophers et al.

6) Take every criticism constructively. To strive to better oneself. Look at self many times before concluding the other is wrong.

7) Defuse tension through humour.

8) To look for good in all, even the most wretched of persons and most vile of situations. To learn and to grow always.
nadya

USA
Posted - Saturday, December 25, 2004  -  10:43 AM Reply with quote
Asalamu Alaykum

I agree with what you have to say, more than often we approach others with the preconceived notion that "we are right and all else is wrong", so that all discourse becomes an effort of merely proving that and nothing more. It seems to me that we move around with impenetrable fortresses around our minds, without doors, just bombardment pipelines. What then is the point of such drawing room, after dinner, coffee discussions, except to show case our own superiority of intellect and education, to highlight our grand perception and understanding to pamper our pride and pacify our souls for a good night's rest. Such discourse is like fodder, chewed and spat, nothing learned or achieved. When people develop such an attitude, progress comes to a halt, for in an exchange of ideas and knowledge lies evolution of minds and society, but when discussions are close ended even before they begin, the end is very different.

Besides arrogance, the reasons for discarding different views also lies in ignorance. If we lack in knowledge about any sphere, when presented with something new about that field, which we are not already familiar with, many times the response is in denial rather than curiosity and inquisition.

Other times, like you pointed out the reasons are psychological. Sometimes people identify the ideas they are familiar with, with their own identity of self, so that the individual consciousness shapes in relation to the social or family consciousness as people often do not consciously pick or formulate the ideas that define them. And when an opposing viewpoint comes along their communal and individual sense feels violated. Change threatens the security of the familiar and they feel inclined to stand by what they have known as true through familiarity and "elder wisdom", preserving of which then seems integral to persevering one's own identity as the latter had been derived from the former. We need to get out of the tangles of reverence of the familiar, or social beliefs, or reverence of anyone's ideology that we put up on a pedestal, rather we should evaluate all ideas irrespective of their source on basis of merit; not look to the speaker but to what is spoken.

And then there is intolerance of opposing views because people perceive them as a threat to their political or religious power sucked through mass following. So that people of opposing views whether they lie in a different sect of the same faith or in a different faith are portrayed as deviated and evil. On claims of self righteousness and piety, other people are dammed and people are divided into hostile groups each laying exclusive claim to salvation.

Before we can be fair to anyone else we need to stand before ourselves in judgment. We need to blow off the dust we have gathered along the way and fair intention and honest effort judge and evaluate our own beliefs, actions and intentions.

We need to recognize our limitations to knowledge and effort and our inherent fallibility.

And we need to inculcate the principles towards which you have already pointed.
Thank you for your insight.
student1

PAKISTAN
Posted - Friday, January 21, 2005  -  7:44 AM Reply with quote
Asalam Aalaikum

Not all people are like that,but some people are impatient with opposing views and I think that is because of the lack of tolerance in them, a person with tolerance will never become impatient with others opposing views but instead he will try to make his views clear to the other person and give reasonings to justify his views.

Islam teaches us to be tolerant and peaceful and we should teach others to be tolerant and peaceful, it is this impatience which caused so much divisions between Muslims that it has become very difficult for them to unite.

Regards,
Irsalfwalsh

PAKISTAN
Posted - Saturday, March 26, 2005  -  9:31 PM Reply with quote
With name of Allah

People are impatient with opposing views due to lack of education?

Salam!
student1

PAKISTAN
Posted - Friday, May 27, 2005  -  12:51 PM Reply with quote
quote:

Asalamu Alaykum
(peace be upon you)

Why do you think people are impatient with views different from their own?
What can we do to change this attitude in and around us?
Please write in your thoughts.


Asalam Aalaikum

Their could be several reasons for being impatient. One of the possible reason in my opinion could be lack of proper guidance and education.
Only those people become impatient with others views who donot have stock of tolerance in them.

A person should listen to others views with an open and non-conservative mind and this will surely help in the progress of the dialog between these people.

Regards,

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